Sometimes you want to eat wings naked, sometimes you want to eat wings whilst watching Downton Abbey, sometimes you want to eat wings while crying. In all three of these scenarios, it’s probably best/easiest/advisable to consume wings in the privacy of ones own home. Personally, I do not believe in delivery wings. Delivery wings become wings you need to rejuvenate and bring back to life via a good broil. The crisp is ALWAYS lost in the commute. So- make your own. Freshness and fun guaranteed!

I scoured and I mean SCOURED the internet for recipes. I wanted them crispy. I also decided that it is important to bake them. I cannot fry wangz to perfection the way wing joints can with their actual deep friers and I also don’t know if I feel comfortable putting meat in a fryer, seeing myself do it with my own eyes, and then putting that meat in my own mouth (I hear “Bootylicious” playing in my mind).

Any recipe not featuring Franks was IGNORED. I ended up thinking that a lot of recipes had good ideas, and that I would merge them into one. Here are the results with PHOTOGRAPHIC PROOF to illustrate the successful cooking operation. I only wish we had access the technology enjoyed by the crew on Starship Enterprise- If only you could touch the screen and have them appear before you:(…

HELLA CRISPY 10/10 HOME WING RECIPE:

-Raw Wings, flats and drumsticks
-Frank’s Red Hot Regular Buffalo Sauce
-Frank’s Red Hot Hot Buffalo Sauce
-Sticks of butter
-White Vinegar (optional)
-Celery
-Blue Cheese

1) Preheat Oven to 450 degrees F and then get a pasta pot, fill it 2/3 full of water salt it. It should taste almost like sea-water. When it boils toss your raw wings in. Do this for 8-10 mins depending on how many wings you’re making. This is called parboiling, it makes them lose some of their excess fat and helps them to crisp later.

2) Next, place your wings over a rack so that they can lose excess water. I grabbed some cookie racks and put glasses under- do what you can with what you’ve got!

3) Place on paper towels to grab any excess moisture, be careful they can get a bit sticky!

4) Prep your sauce!!! This is where personal preference comes in. I personally like my wings to be HOT but not obscenely hot or at that place where your tongue feels numb or tazered. I think a consistent lip sting is a good place to be, maybe a bit of sweat. Ultra-Mild wings are for losers. That said. I bought the Franks normal sauce and Frank’s “HOT.” The hot brings the heat to the table whereas the normal has a TINY bit of sweetness to it. I toyed around with it a bit, but at the end my sauce was about 2/4’s Frank’s “hot” sauce , 1/4 Frank’s regular, and 1/4 butter. Melt your butter, then add sauce, add sauce, then melt… it does not matter.

5) Place your wings on ungreased cookie sheet (butter will help not stick), coat one side, and flip them immediately and do the other. I had a little “sauce wand” but wings can also be dipped or whatever you can imagine, just make sure they are throughly covered!

6) Place wings in oven on a higher level rack. Let wings cook for 25-30 minutes. Remove wings and flip them. Now for a SUPREMELY CRISP WING put back in on higher rack with heat set to BROIL. For a super crispy wing place wings back in over as they were at 450, leave in for an additional 5 mins.

7) When you remove the wings give them a gooooood sauce-toss!! There is no need for a lot of butter this time (as long as you are not a wingloser) because they of their initial coat. This time do hot sauce, a few teaspoons of vinegar (if desired!) toss, toss, toss, plate w blue cheese and wing paraphernalia, and CONSUME!!!!

Crispyyyyy!!

Beautiful!

****NOTE!****** NONE of this would have been possible without my wing partner of the evening, my wonderful MOM!!!! She helped me sauce, flip, reflect!! She is a winglover and TOPNOTCH cook, it was wonderful to have her to consult with throughout the entire process!!!!